Moving Back Home With The Parents? Here Are Some Quick Survival Tips

Congratulations, you just graduated from college and now are moving back home with the parents. Whether you are happy to be moving back home or not, my guess is that you want two things to happen:

 1) for your parents to respect you and treat you like the adult

and

 2) to not to end up fighting with your parents like you are back in high school

How do you do that?

I am first going to start by saying something that might make you a little mad but I say it with love.  If you want your parents to treat you like an adult you have to act like an adult. You have to look at your own behavior and recognize that respect goes both ways. You cannot revert back to any old child-like behaviors and expect to be treated like an adult. Don’t forget this is an adjustment for your parents as well. You are all getting to know each other in a new way.

Don’t wait until you have your first fight to sit down and create a plan for living together. Initiate a meeting the day you move in. Not day 5, 10 or 90. Day 1.

Before the meeting spend a little time writing down how you would like to be treated. What are your limits and boundaries? Then take a moment and try and put yourself in your parent’s shoes. What would they need from you?

Establishing boundaries early on will prevent future fights and will also help your parents see you in a new way. Instead of screaming at them “I’m an adult, leave me alone.” You will be showing them that they can leave you alone because you are an adult now.

Good luck!

Kate Rufener